We all cry because we all hurt. Whether people see us cry or we do it alone in our houses at night, we’re all doing it.
And it’s hard to know that at any point, your best friend could be screaming as tears full her eyes and fall from her face. That angel may have finally fallen to her knees and can’t get up…
She might feel helpless and alone and she may never tell you and as you tell her it’s alright and you hurt inside, you’ll probably never tell her you’re dying too.
Or you might be one of those who, like me, let the anxiety and the weight of it all build up. It brews heavily inside you; starting in your stomach when you lose an appetite, and then it goes to your head and you can’t focus or see straight anymore. Then it becomes overwhelming and your body becomes exhausted and weakened and you just have to wait because you know, inevitably, you’re going to breakdown. You’re going to breakdown in a school hallway or a classroom or sitting with your friends. Perhaps even alone. You’re going to fall to your knees as you cry and you’re going to lay there as people walk over you and as they stare. You’re going to shut the world out and look at the darkness deep in your soul as staff shake you and plead for you to stop. ‘You’re upsetting other children’ they tell you. But they don’t stop for a minute to recognise that this happens because you hurt so phenomenally inside and the pain is too intense. They ask ‘why?’ But they don’t know you can’t answer them because you’re afraid, because when they know they’ll do things, they’ll isolate you and remove you and then they’ll tell you ‘we care’ but do they really? They don’t know you, they can’t say they really care.
In a week or a month, people might forget it, or they might just stop caring. They might tell themselves it never happened so they don’t have to think or care about it. But you, that person that hit the floor so coldly and quickly, won’t forget it until it’s sorted.
I’m not saying don’t break down or talk about it every second of the day; it’s healthy to talk but sometimes people can’t take the extra load and you never know if they’re struggling on the inside but smiling for you. When things seem wrong it’s time to step down, and you’ll be given your time later because everyone has time for everybody but like the hands on a clock, we have to wait for the time to come.
It’s alright to cry, it’s even healthy. What isn’t good to do is to let it summer until it boils over a while later. Please don’t face the humiliation like me- save your souls by finding a suitable release. Don’t hurt any more than you need to, every human being is truly beautiful.
It’s more than just inspiring and uplifting to know I’m not alone with my thoughts. It makes me feel human again and I’m not walking dead.
These days as much as I wanted to cry, they won’t go out anymore.
Thank you for your words.
PS
You can check my blog (http://thewandereroftheunknown.wordpress.com) to see how I have become such an apathetic fool these days.
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You’re never alone and im always here to talk to 🙂
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Thanks!
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So beautiful and once again so similar to what I’ve experienced. I’m exactly the same too where I let everything just stack up on one another all these years and crashed several months ago. When I read your posts I’ve realized that it would be great to meet you someday because of how similar we sound. 🙂
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That would be amazing, im in london in england, where are you?
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I’m in NYC. So far!!!
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Thats so annoying 😰
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If you ever need someone to talk too im here no matter what it is.
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Reblogged this on Set me free..
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Hey remmbr dt once u cry fr 1 thing do not cry over again n again fr d same thing …everything happens fr a reason..dnt let nythn gt into u soo much..be strong..☺
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I felt a billion stars touching my soul and lighting up my corner when I read this.
I can very much relate!
P.S.
You express your thoughts eloquently, and it’s not everyday a person can do that.
Keep up the good work!
P.P.S.
Could you give me some advice about writing?
I’d love to hear from you.
Please check out my blog sometime: http://www.theanblivion.wordpress.com
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I’d love to get in touch! If you email me at nicolekeen@icloud.com thats probably easiest? It means the world when people relate to my blog and you’re the first whos wanted to get in contact and honestly, its touched so deeply in my soul and i hope you can email me 🙂
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Hi again!
I’d really loove to email you..
But there’s one thing,
Could I use gmail to send you emails in that icloud account?
Thanks!😊
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Yes, you should be able to email it just fine 😊 looking forward to it
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Hi for the third time!
I just sent my mail,
and hope you read it soon!
P.S.
My email’s anondoodlyoreo@gmail.com btw.
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Ill go check, fingers crossed!
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Very well expressed and interesting when you find out that you aren’t alone. There comes a time when each one if us let’s the pressure build up till we erupt like a volcano of tears. Then we want to hide in the nearest room with a lock to let it all out. Best of luck
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Thank you very much
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