We all cry because we all hurt. Whether people see us cry or we do it alone in our houses at night, we’re all doing it.
And it’s hard to know that at any point, your best friend could be screaming as tears full her eyes and fall from her face. That angel may have finally fallen to her knees and can’t get up…
She might feel helpless and alone and she may never tell you and as you tell her it’s alright and you hurt inside, you’ll probably never tell her you’re dying too.
Or you might be one of those who, like me, let the anxiety and the weight of it all build up. It brews heavily inside you; starting in your stomach when you lose an appetite, and then it goes to your head and you can’t focus or see straight anymore. Then it becomes overwhelming and your body becomes exhausted and weakened and you just have to wait because you know, inevitably, you’re going to breakdown. You’re going to breakdown in a school hallway or a classroom or sitting with your friends. Perhaps even alone. You’re going to fall to your knees as you cry and you’re going to lay there as people walk over you and as they stare. You’re going to shut the world out and look at the darkness deep in your soul as staff shake you and plead for you to stop. ‘You’re upsetting other children’ they tell you. But they don’t stop for a minute to recognise that this happens because you hurt so phenomenally inside and the pain is too intense. They ask ‘why?’ But they don’t know you can’t answer them because you’re afraid, because when they know they’ll do things, they’ll isolate you and remove you and then they’ll tell you ‘we care’ but do they really? They don’t know you, they can’t say they really care.
In a week or a month, people might forget it, or they might just stop caring. They might tell themselves it never happened so they don’t have to think or care about it. But you, that person that hit the floor so coldly and quickly, won’t forget it until it’s sorted.
I’m not saying don’t break down or talk about it every second of the day; it’s healthy to talk but sometimes people can’t take the extra load and you never know if they’re struggling on the inside but smiling for you. When things seem wrong it’s time to step down, and you’ll be given your time later because everyone has time for everybody but like the hands on a clock, we have to wait for the time to come.
It’s alright to cry, it’s even healthy. What isn’t good to do is to let it summer until it boils over a while later. Please don’t face the humiliation like me- save your souls by finding a suitable release. Don’t hurt any more than you need to, every human being is truly beautiful.

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